Author Archive

The “Science” and “Art” of Communication Part 2

Tuesday, May 15th, 2012

Common mistakes people make in Communicating
 
1. Not being specific enough
 
It is important to understand that often the biggest mistake you may be making is that you are not clear on what you are trying to achieve. Be very clear about what you are trying to accomplish. Ask yourself this question, “What is it I want my audience to think, feel and /or do?”
 
Keep in mind thinking is intellectual which changes the way they “perceive” things. Feeling is “emotional” and doing is about “taking action”. The best communication should touch on all three: Change how people think, create positive emotion, which in turn leads to positive action. If you find yourself failing in communicating it may not be from a lack of skill set, it may be as simple as you are just being unspecific. You leave it up to your audience to figure out what they want or need when in fact it is up to you, the communicator, to illicit the right response. If your audience does not “get it” you need to take responsibility and not place blame.
 
2. Not investing the effort and doing the hard work
 
We now live in the age of simple, easy and instantaneous. Convenience is nice but too often we forget that those who are really good at what they do are those who invest the effort to learn and develop necessary skills.
 
3. Not having something significant or important to say
 
Hubert Humphries said, “The right to be heard does not always automatically include the right to be taken seriously.” It is easy to write a blog or post something out on the internet but if what your putting out there has no significance or importance it will easily get lost in the noise, clutter and confusion. Your message needs to cut through those things and will affect people and make them care. If people don’t care, they don’t listen regardless of the clarity of the message.
 
Things that you can do RIGHT in Communicating
 
Think of the “C’s” of communicating. Commit these to memory and help yourself be a much more effective communicator.
 
1. CLEAR – Be pinpoint accurate on what you are trying to accomplish.
 
2. CONFIDENT – Believe that your message is important; that you are a good messenger and that your audience is important enough to invest time into communicating with them.
 
3. CONSISTENCE – Consistency is critical because of the amount of uncertainty typically communicated. Therefore sometimes the best tool you have for retention is to repeat your message so many times that the listener could repeat it in their sleep. Samuel Johnson said, “People need to be reminded more than they need to be instructed.”
 
4. CATCHY – Remember to avoid or penetrate the noise, clutter and confusion. This is the difference between saying, for example, “It’s a really good car” or saying “It’s the ultimate driving machine”, a great example of this “C” from BMW. Even if you don’t own one you know it is “The Ultimate Driving Machine”.
 
5. COMPELLING – Arguably the most important one of all. Remember, you must create positive “emotion” to lead to positive “action”
 
Keep these in mind in order to master the “Science” and “Art” of Communication
 
 

Mastering Relationships Part 1

Wednesday, May 9th, 2012


 
In one of my past articles 10 Things you should Know and Do before you are 40 I briefly touched on the importance of Creating Solid Relationships.  I would not like to take that a step further and focus on Mastering Relationships.  This will be Key Tips in bullet point fashion to help you start to Master Relationships.  Take a moment and reflect on the meaning of each point and how it applies to you.  Measure your success with relationships and allow the Key Tips to help you grow where necessary.

  • How can I give more value to the relationships in my life?
  • The quality of life is based on the balance of relationships.
  • All relationships start with “me”. I must love “me” before other can.
  • How do I value my relationships with others?
  • I decide how people treat me.  Do they walk all over me or treat me with respect?
  • I must love myself for who I am and visualize myself in my perfect state.
  • Treat yourself in a perfect way and others will too.
  • Take yourself seriously  and others will too.
  • Keep in mind that often what you don’t like in someone else may also be what you don’t like in yourself.
  • Vibrate on a higher plane.  To notice someone’s negatives, you have to be vibrating negatively yourself.
  • Strive to find something good in everyone.
  • Hold onto your beliefs as to inspire and empower others to do the same.
  • Remember that everyone is doing the best they can with what they have been given in life.
  • Show others how to be in a good relationship with you by being the example you would like them to be.
  • You can attract the people you need to help you achieve your dreams by being the person you want to be.
  • Connect with others on a personal level and then bring them up with your excitement.  also, allow them the bring you up with their’s when necessary.
  • See yourself more exciting, you will become more exciting and attract others
  • Be sure that what you communicate is being carried out by your actions.
  • Communicate to the RIGHT people.

 

This is a short but powerful checklist to help Master Relationships.  Stay tuned for Part 2 as we will build upon this initial checklist to help you Master your relationship with others.

 
 

10 Things you should Know and Do before you are 40

Monday, April 9th, 2012


 
As I approach my 40th Birthday I started thinking about the things that were important to me.  While it was difficult to do, I was able to pick out a Top 10 Things to Know and Do before you are 40.  These are all simple and practical steps and truthfully can be applicable to any age.  Here we go:
 
1. Know Yourself – When I say “Know Yourself” I am referring to your strengths and weaknesses.  We all have them and just like fingerprints that vary for each one of us.  Knowing your strengths will help yo to know where to focus your efforts and opportunities to excel.  It will help you achieve your goals and attain personal satisfaction.  On the other hand, knowing your weaknesses can be equally if not more beneficial.  When you know your weakness and even more important, willing to admit your weaknesses, you have a foundation for growth.  You can create a list of areas to spend as much time getting better at as you do on the things that come natural.  You can also evaluate if the weakness is something you should avoid and allow others to accomplish.
 
2. Settle Your Family Life – This is mostly for the married couples but truthfully can exist with parents, children or any other relatives.  Recognize issues that may exist, things that are lingering and unaddressed.  It is important to get them out in the open and “handled”.  One thing we are not promised in life is time and once someone is gone the opportunity to set things right goes as well, yet the guilt of not doing so can last forever.  Relationships, especially marriages, require constant work and nurturing.
 
3. Determine Your Priorities – It is said that every seven years we change as people and everything from out tastes, likes & dislikes, ambitions and priorities.  It is vital to keep track of your priorities, write them down and occasionally review them for any changes, additions or subtractions.  This will help you keep focused on what is important and worth giving your time to.
 
4. Develop Your Philosophy – How do you define your life?  What is your vision for your future? It is critical to know what you believe in, what/who you are willing to die for and what things in your life are optional.  Alexander Hamilton said, “Those who stand for nothing fall for anything”.
 
5. Get Physically Fit – As we get older and absorbed in our careers, goals, lives, etc. one of the areas we often overlook is our health.  This has become a VITAL area for me over the past few years and a journey that in a short time has taught me more about myself than anything before it.  Remember, don’t give up your “health” in an effort to gain “wealth”.  A strong body leads to a strong mind which leads to a strong future.
 
6. Learn Your Trade – Always be a student of your trade.  The day you think you cannot learn anything else  about your trade is the day you need to get out of it.  To be most successful at your trade; learn, earn and return.  the biggest key is to remember to give back more than you receive.
 
7. Pay The Price – Success cannot be accomplished without sacrifice.  You have heard it all, “Nothing in life is easy” “Anything worth having is worth working for” These and similar statements are profound and should not be taken lightly.  Your “ah hah” moment with this one is when you realize and are willing to accept that you may sacrifice and not see success but trust that those who follow will reap the success of your sacrifice.  Some would call it a characteristic of leadership.
 
8. Develop Solid Relationships – In the day and age of social media the word “friend” has a whole new meaning.  Solid relationships are important because life’s greatest experiences involve people.  I have had some of the best times of my life and created unforgettable memories with the guys I have developed solid relationships with, a brotherhood if you will.  Take a moment and review your social media “friends”.  How many do you have a solid relationship with?
 
9. Prepare For The Future – By nature we always want the biggest and best.  This is very prevalent in the Event Industry.  Often we are judged by the equipment we carry, the amount of lights we have, how many songs in our library, etc.  While these things are vital to our craft, in the grand scheme of life how important are they?  Consider living life in such a way that you have options later on when you have played that last song.  Consider purchasing the “second best” and saving the difference for retirement.
 
10. Find Purpose In You Life – True success comes from knowing and executing your purpose in life.  Never stop growing to your maximum potential and continue sewing seeds, even if only others down the line benefit from them.
 
The first Quarter of 2012 has already come to an end and no matter if you are 40, 20 or 60 do a self evaluation of these 10 things and see where you stand with them.  You may find that you need to work on some and also be right where you need to be with others.
 
Remember…You’re either Green and Growing or Ripe and Rotting!!!
 
 

The “Science” and “Art” of Communication Part 1

Friday, March 23rd, 2012

The “Science” and “Art” of Communication
 
Think of a bottle of wine. Sometimes you can have good wine in a bad bottle. You look at the bottle and it is not that impressive but it tastes wonderful. Sometimes you have a bottle that looks terrific but the wine inside is not so good. The goal in effective communication should be to have both substance and style.
 
Science is built on practices, rules and procedures while art is more of an inherent creative process. The best communicators will learn to combine the two. They will take the best of each and create an effective outcome. Science without art can make communication seem sterile while art without science can make communication very chaotic. Your goal should be to combine creativity with discipline to create the most favorable outcome.
 
Let’s look at some examples…
 
The perfect “right down the middle” would be the late Steve Jobs. People would hang on his every word. That was because he would always couple the good science of technology and products and talk about them in an informative, factual way with his own passion and enthusiasm about the design and end user effectiveness.
 
A good example of the Science right but the art wrong would be the prototypical college professor that goes on and on, for example the character that Ben Stein played in the movie Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. A great example of someone who disseminates the information and then strives for involvement, “Anyone, anyone, anyone?” This individual has the information down but has diminished the impact because of poor delivery and lack of creativity.
 
A good example of getting the Art right but the science wrong, are those who tend to be very passionate. You find yourself connecting with their enthusiasm but in the find yourself asking, “What was that all about?” You knew they felt strongly about something, you are just not sure what about.
 
So what is “Winning Communication”?
 
George Bernard Shaw said, “The problem with communication is the illusion it has been accomplished.” The potential for bad communication is of great. Especially in the fast paced word of the Internet, mobile devices and busy lives we lead. I remember some years ago my son, as we walked into a restaurant, read a sign on a chalkboard the read “Fish – All You Can Eat”. He looked at me and said, “Oh No! All you can eat is fish???” This is a perfect example of how, even just subtlety, misinterpreting communication one can come to the wrong conclusion.
 
Therefore, “Winning Communication” can be defined as being heard and understood. For “Winning Communication” to take place your message needs to not only be heard (or read) but the intended effect of that communication also needs to be achieved.
 
Keep in mind communication is in fact “response you get”. How effective you are communicating is more about what is “heard” than what is “said”. Often times we find ourselves saying, “But this is what I said” but if the person who responded didn’t “get it” then the responsibility of poor communication falls onto the person who said it.
 
Stay tuned for Part Two when I will share some of the wrong ways to avoid when communicating and the “C”s of communication.
 
 

The 5 Steps to More Efficient Learning

Tuesday, March 20th, 2012

The 5 Steps to More Efficient Learning
 
1. Repetition – read/watch the material until you gain:
 
2. Familiarity – when you become familiar with the subject matter, you will gain:
 
3. Confidence – once you’ve achieved confidence, you are prepared to take the appropriate:
 
4. Action – and action, my friends, yields:
 
5. Results -measure your results so that you may improve them, and then repeat the process!
 
growth, learning
 
When we learn more, we can DO more, accomplish more.  Apply these simple steps and watch your business soar to new heights.
 
 

Exercise

Wednesday, March 14th, 2012

Exercise is one of the best tools to help combat depression. Leading an active, physical lifestyle will help you to alleviate stress and increase your endorphin levels. The next time you feel sad, instead of wallowing in your depression, or engaging in negative activities like drinking alcohol or overeating, try going for a nice long walk or bike ride, and you will be amazed at how much better you feel.
 

 
 

Generate Customer Referrals: How To

Tuesday, June 14th, 2011

In any business a large portion of sales will come from referrals; in the wedding business they are many times responsible for more than half of total sales. When you get a client/customer through a referral they are already motivated to buy from you which by default, should make your sale much easier.
 
Alexandra Levit writes about the importance in creating a system for gaining referrals in her blog review of John Jantsch’s book, The Referral Engine: Teaching Your Business to Market Itself.   John book suggests making referrals an automatic habit for your customers by equipping them with tools that allow them to introduce you and your products and services in logical ways.
 
Examples include:

  • Personalized referral cards that credit your customer with sending a lead
  • Gift certificates with tangible value that a customer can simply hand out
  • Trial offers and free evaluations only available through customer referrals
  • Customer-exclusive “bring a friend” events
  • Personalized web pages that customers can use to educate prospects

 
How do you facilitate customer referrals to your organization?
 
 

Sometimes you just have to dare to risk public criticism!

Thursday, July 15th, 2010

I have made it my goal to help the Mobile DJ and Event Industry lose 1,000 pounds, including myself!
 
Several people have commented saying, “You don’t look like I need to lose weight”. Now, while I want to believe that most of the people who said that were only being nice, the fact of the matter is that I have worked hard for several years now trying to hide the truth about my weight.
 
Knowing that 40 is only a few years around the corner I have come to realize that if I don’t do something about my health and weight I will not be around to enjoy seeing my children get married or holding a grandchild in my arms. I won’t be able to live out the “golden years” I work so hard on now to have.
 
The first step is to overcome the fear of public criticism and admit I have a problem that needs to be fixed. I have decided to put together series of radical advertisements in hopes to accomplish 2 things:
 
1. To expose my weight issues to the world in a tactful and respectful way so that others will see that I truly do have some issues to work on. I do not in anyway want to offend anyone and will not say something about another person that I can’t say about myself.
 
2. To be a leader to others who may be in my very same position I am in and feel like they are alone.
 
The truth is you are not alone. 1 out of every 3 Mobile DJs is overweight or obese. The statistics are not too much better in the Event Industry as a whole. I hope that by taking the first step others will join me so that we can support and encourage one another to achieve our individual and collective goals together. Just by adding two or three people to your challenge will help you be accountable and increases your odds of success beyond belief.
 
I want to thank those who have already joined me and welcome any others that would like to be a part of the team. I can promise respect, love and support to every member of this team. Failure will not be an option and we will have a blast together!
 
Are you ready to join us?
 
Join The Challenge
 
David-weight-loss

*Results will vary.